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the dark night of hatred does not recognize its source
the plight of the humiliated, tortured, helpless child
because hatred towards your own parents is
condemned, denied, covered with silence
buried under the command to honor and forgive them
the source of blind hatred stems from the suppressed outrage
and the unacknowledged pain of the tormented child
it may lash out later, released with political or religious approval
towards others—towards those perceived as a threat
to one’s identity, safety, or to one’s beliefs
unrecognized and unacknowledged by society
this hatred cannot be overcome
unless it is faced honestly and healed inside
unless its origin is revealed—the passion of the powerless child
the suffering and cross of the persecuted child
whose basic needs for protection, help, safety and love
remained unfulfilled
hatred is outrage that could not be experienced or acknowledged
as inhumanity and hatred were handed down to her
the abused and mistreated child even had to beg for forgiveness
silenced by the law of forgiveness
this outrage is forced deeper and deeper into the child’s soul
where it becomes unconscious hatred and never-ending pain
a volcano forms—ready to explode at any time
but hatred—experienced and understood—
reveals the child’s nightmare
hatred—accepted and compassionately embraced
—witnessed by a therapist who is on the child’s side
tells the truth of the humiliated, abandoned child
the truth reaches her consciousness
as if a lost and sunken ship is finally rescued
brought from the dark, invisible depth of the ocean
to the surface of the water
the truth of an unbearable situation is revealed
the truth of the tortured child
recognized, acknowledged, accepted
the truth is welcome and finally known—and here to stay
no more need to hate oneself or others
understood and compassionately embraced
hatred can be released
its destructive energy
is transformed into an empowering strength
to lovingly take care of my needs
to fulfill my passions
to build a meaningful life
hatred of my parents that became conscious and integrated
painted a clear picture of my childhood reality
and removed me
from my parents’ beliefs and destructiveness
empowered to set boundaries—I become my Self
now I know the truth
now I can live in truth and be true to my Self
as I forgive myself for not allowing the truth to live for so long
© Barbara Rogers
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Screams from Childhood |
