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every step of the alive child was treated like a crime
perceived by her parents as a mistake—or even a sin
innocent steps brought terror and disaster instead of loving help
timid, insecure steps into life evoked catastrophic judgments
justified by gruesome interpretations and accusations
endless was the arsenal to degrade and hurt the child
forgiveness was preached—but childhood was
the land of unforgiveness—where forgiveness was not practiced
the myths of education and discipline permitted
every unforgiving attitude and action imaginable under the sun
and used the child as a defenseless, powerless victim
why are those without power reprimanded and punished
while those with power must be unconditionally forgiven?
why was the child never forgiven—but taught to always forgive?
children, so completely reliant on others for their survival
must experience forgiveness
it is the vital nourishment for their humanity
show me, mother, the spirit of forgiveness
don’t be merciless and brutally strict—ban physical punishment
stop inflicting pain on me through your words and actions
with what you believe and think about me—with how you see me
too many wounds and hurt places inside me stem from it
they render me powerless
you did not practice forgiveness with your child
unforgiveness ruled your kingdom
it kept my soul your captive and my Self your slave
until I forgave myself for choosing a different way of life
—you never forgave me for leaving your world of unforgiveness
© Barbara Rogers
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Screams from Childhood |
